Scales

I don't know what's happened to me but my maudlin capacity is not up to par. Under instruction from knowledgeable quarters I am 'spring cleaning' - literally. I have decided that seeing as Him Formerly has moved out then I don't have to put up with Him Formerly's stuff staring at me everyday. In its irritatingly smug way.

So, tonight, IKEA bags at the ready, I prepared to go through various shelves and sort the wheat from the chaff so to speak. Tissues were also at the ready as I was fully prepared for some nostalgic sentimental moments as I sifted through what was once a joint collection of CDs, DVDs and books.

IKEA bags played their role perfectly. I now have two large square blue bags sitting in the corner of the study awaiting their fate. Contents not looking so smug now. Tissues however remain untouched. Dolefully sitting on the desk, looking at me in disbelief that they are surplus to requirements. And I am looking right back at them thinking the same.

So I sat down and tried to maudle a bit. On purpose. Nothing. Not a hint of a maudle could be squeezed out and so I started playing around with windows media player, thinking a few sounds might get me more in the mood. They did. In the mood for dancing, so I laid down a few Northern Soul moves for 20 minutes or so and then returned to the desk. And the disconsolate tissues.

The lack of tears concerned me for a time. After all, in past weeks I have managed to shed them by the gallon per hour. But then it dawned on me. The scales have fallen from my eyes so they don't sting anymore.

I've put the tissues in the bin.

Yours in hope and fear, AJ x