I am imagining myself in the future. Some time when all this heartache is over and done with and a new man comes into my life. Maybe someone I've been friends with for a while. Someone I've worked with. Maybe even someone who has introduced me to his girlfriend a few times.
Just maybe, this new man will tell me he is unhappy in his current relationship; it's only been 15 years and the past year has been awful because his girlfriend has been so miserable and difficult to live with because she has had a really tough time. He might even try and convince me that it has been awful for 3 years, or 5 years, or 10 years. His girlfriend clearly doesn't understand him.
I quite fancy this man. I know him very well indeed, having been to the cinema with him a few times and let him cry on my shoulder (It's ok, his girlfriend knew he was at the cinema with me. As friends). Besides, I have been a bit short on the admirers front of late so if he is interested why not? His girlfriend is clearly the selfish, inconsiderate sort, making his life miserable just because she is unhappy. Some girls can be like that you know, getting all unhappy on their own.
Surely it would make perfect sense to have this man for myself? He will be much happier with me. Ooh, and how exciting - just to make sure we start out on a sound footing it would excellent if he could move in with me on the same day he leaves his 15 year relationship. I'll put his baggage in the bedroom.
You know what. I can't imagine that scenario at all.
Yours in hope and fear (and some incredulity) , AJ x
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