Detail

I do believe I have received a complaint. I have been receiving complainettes, (i.e. little ones) but today my Facebook inbox definitely had a fully grown one stating last blog was high on philosophy and low on detail. From Big Cuz. Which makes it quite a serious complaint in my book.

It undoubtedly stems from the fact I had some blog free days. Even though the point of this exercise was to write daily. Because I haven't it is tempting to berate myself for being lazy/shallow/unfocused (most likely lazy) and give myself a damned good talking to, replete with personal insults and abuse.

However tempting it might be though, 'been there, done that', springs to mind. And the only thing that proved good for was nothing very much at all. The bottom line is that there is only so much of that kind of talking to I am prepared to accept. I've had my fill.

Project:Life Changing initially felt like the start of something that would culminate in change. It hadn't occurred to me there would be no culmination, no final reveal, no denouement. It never occurred to me that it was from the moment of inception, from the moment I posted those first words, that life would begin to change.

From that singular moment when I made up my mind to blog through the process and shed my sickness in words, my life took a new direction. Change began at the beginning and isn't waiting for the end. It has been changing ever since and at a rate more astonishing than I could have anticipated. A rate more swift that no amount of 'told you so's' could have predicted. A rate at which has demanded some contemplation.

So my silence of late is nothing to be ashamed of. It isn't a failing. It is the time I have needed to recover my senses and emerge from the strangeness of this changing life. I was not being lazy. I was just cautiously unfurling my wings and stretching out in the sun, timidly facing the world and its wonders with a quiet "Hello, I'm back".

Only this time I might just be back with a vengeance. And a 'phone call to Big Cuz with the details.

Yours in hope and fear, AJ x