By way of an introduction ...

Well, with the creation of this blog, here goes to perhaps one step in the right direction. Said direction is as yet, unknown. However, it is to be hoped that whatever direction I head towards I can, for a short time at least, avoid any more spanners being thrown in the works by either fate, destiny, luck or my own stupidity. This is one girl who definitely needs a break.

In summary: the past few months has subjected me to the death of my oldest and closest friend; the break-up of a dear friendship of some 28 years; the loss of my all-time favourite job (redundancy due in August. Am putting up a fight. Losing battle springs to mind); and the totally unexpected announcement that my partner of 15 years wants us to separate. So, in terms of stress factors, I really appear to have hit the jackpot. Oh, and I perhaps should mention that I have the delight of mental health issues to deal with too, having many moons ago recovered from agorophobia I am now merely subjected to general anxiety with odd dollops of panic attacks and depression thrown in.

So. I clearly need to do something to keep sane and give me a focus. Having recently watched Julie & Julia and recognised a kindred spirit in Julie's frustrated writer/lack of application/can't stick to the job approach to life I got to thinking perhaps it might work for me too. The discipline of blogging I mean; I can cook reasonably well but don't much fancy the commitment to culinary indulgence as part of Project: Life Changing is to shift two stone in weight. Among other things.

Project: Life Changing is about me putting it out there for all to see with the hope that it will inspire me to keep on track by publicly declaring/discussing/bemoaning successes and failures. And the secret extra hope is that I get to feel useful again with my sharing perhaps encouraging others to try and overcome some horrible times with a little focus, laughter, care and a little bitching and griping thrown in for good measure.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no brave bunny. Just trying to learn how to become one and change my life for the better. So now I'm signing off to have a cigarette (giving up is also part of the project, though as any fellow social outcasts out there will know, it will not be immediately forthcoming). Between puffs I will be pondering how best to present Project:Life Changing.

In fear and hope, AJ x